daYs oF my LiFe

Mssing those days...

2008-05-17T21:21:00.003+08:00

Its been long since i blogged and sister has been reading my entries over and over again for AGES!.. well.. i was reading my below entry.. and i kinda missed those days with sarah... although i shouldnt... i wonder y.. but i doubt she'll ever see this entry... Well... I guess i'm only human.. ppl forgive & Forget.. I called her a few days back.. cuz unknowingly.. she has been appearing in my dreams out of no where... for not much reasons.. and the dreams keeps me bothered and wondering.. so.. if u see this.. maybe u wanna return my call. :)

HappY Halloween! With ULu PanDan WhiskEy

2007-10-30T00:33:00.000+08:00

Its Been Long Since I Partied... :):):) Ulu PanDan WhisKey Had made all of us kinda Lost our minds...

If I could Live On LoVing YoU

2007-10-21T02:41:00.001+08:00

WIll it come true?

Everyday is a Gift

2007-10-21T01:50:00.000+08:00

A Story to Live ByBy Ann Wells (Los Angeles Times)
My brother-in-law opened the bottom drawer of my sister's bureau and lifted out a tissue-wrapped package. 'This,' he said, 'is not a slip. This is lingerie.' He discarded the tissue and handed the slip. It was exquisite; silk, handmade and trimmed with a cobweb of lace. The price tag with an astronomical figure on itwas still attached. 'Jan bought this the first time we went to New York, at least 8 or 9 years ago. She never wore it. She was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is the occasion.'
He took the slip from me and put it on the bed with the other clothes we weretaking to the mortician. He hands lingered on the silk material for a moment,then he slammed the drawer shut and turned to me 'Don't ever save anything for aspecial occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion.' I remembered those words through the funeral and the days that followed when I helped him and my niece attend to all the sad chores that follow an unexpected death. I thought about them on the plane returning to California from the Midwest where my sister's family lives. I though about all the things that she hadn't seen or heard or done. I though about the things that she had done without realizing that they were special.
I'm still thinking about his words, and they've changed my life. I'm reading more and dusting less. I'm sitting on the deck and admiring the view withoutfussing about the weeds in the garden. I'm spending more time with my family and friends and less time in committee meetings. Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experience to savor, not endure. I'm trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them. I'm not "saving" anything; we use our good china and crystal for every special event - such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped, the first camellia blossom. I wear my good blazer to the market if I like it. My theory is if I look prosperous, I can shell out $28.49 for one small bag of groceries without wincing. I'm not saving my good perfume for special parties; clerks in hardware stores and tellers in banks have noses that function as well as my party-going friends.
"Someday" and "one of these days" are losing their grip on my vocabulary. If it's worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it now.
I'm not sure what my sister would've done had she known that she wouldn't be here for the tomorrow we all take for granted. I think she would have called family members and a few close friends. She might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences for past squabbles. I like to think she would have gone out for a Chinese dinner, her favorite food. I'm guessing -I'll never know. It's those little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew that my hours were limited. Angry because I put off seeing good friends whom I was going to get in touch with - someday. Angry because I hadn't written certain letters that I intended to write - one of these days. Angry and sorry that I didn't tell my husband and daughter often enoughhow much I truly love them.
I'm trying very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when I open my eyes, I tell myself that it is special. Every day, every minute, every breath truly is a gift from God.

Snowy's HOME!!

2007-10-17T00:10:00.000+08:00

Snowy's finally Home!! But i've yet to take a picture with him... he hasn't been well the past few days.. but he is better now.. well at least we've got him license under our name.. i feel so sad to see him this way.. i wanna feed him well and make sure he grows so so FAT!!... haha.. he has shrunk..... i wanna bring him out to play one day! Ever since this episode, i'm sure i'll treasue him so much more.. Thank You dearie.. for helping me solve this whole issue.. wat would i be without u....

I mIss U

2007-10-09T23:59:00.000+08:00

Snowy.. i miss u..its been 4 days i realli wonder how u r doing... and i hope u'll really be back home tmr.. I MISSS U so so so much.. and my tears have already run dry....

Living a Happier Life

2007-09-24T23:27:00.000+08:00

I am reading this book now.. and its really good.. after reading it u'll be much happier and contented with wat u have.. trust me :) thank You Dennis for lending me such an awesome book.. i'll consider buying it myself. and maybe other books from Matt & Luke.. then i'll lend u!

With Thanks...

2007-09-23T08:40:00.000+08:00

Its was a pleasant Surprise u gave me.. and i thank you for every little thing that you did.. you made my day.

Keeping it going...

2007-09-19T23:05:00.000+08:00

I thought this is realli meaningful....

The foundation stone. Relationships are like plants. They need to be nurtured with love, care and understanding. You need to work at it on a regular basis and learn the skills needed to make it grow. Those who take relationships for granted and do not take the time to do the maintenance will find a once beautiful relationship will wilt and die. Good communication is the foundation stone of any healthy relationship but there must also be lashings of mutual respect and commitment to each other.Trust each other You must learn to share your thoughts and feelings with your partner,even if they are unpleasant. Very often the fear of offending your partner makes you keep quiet, and you choose to suffer in silence. Not only doing an injustice to you but also sowing the seeds of unhappiness and mistrust.You must trust each other. Suspicion breeds hate, jealousy and sorrow. Often, these feelings get out of control, and destroy relationships. The best way to keep the flame of trust shining bright is to confide in your partner. It removes mistrust, and does not allow misunderstandings to grow. It pays to be honest with each other. Don’t hesitate to brush unpleasant issues under the carpet. If you have done a wrong, let your partner know. You will both feel stronger to face the next challenge. Balanced relationship Being a part of the ‘couple’ should not affect the sense of self. Establishing boundaries where needed helps to maintain a balanced relationship and allows each to become fulfilled. Keep your own hobbies and pastimes but remember to share an interest in what your partner does as well. You are two separate entities with often-differing likes, dislikes, traits and interest. Respecting and allowing for these differences is essential for reducing conflict.“Warts and All”Love brings along many expectations that need to be met. Every partner expects something from the other. But the expectations must be realistic and achievable. If both partners understand that that neither of them is perfect and accept each other “Warts and All” It will help them enjoy an equitably and contented life together.

There are three stages in every relationship.The first is attraction. When you are first attracted to a person, you wish to know more about them, there likes, dislikes, interests etc. Then you gather courage to make your first move like asking to come for a movie, dance or dinner. Both partners often feeling embarrassed and awkward but probably mostly feeling over come with wonderful feelings about your newfound love.

The second is the testing stage. This is the stage when the relationship starts blooming. You are both learning more about each other. If you hide your emotions or are deceitful in any way at this stage, then you can be sure that you are building weak foundations. The relationship any well seem to flourish for a while but that weakness will undermine all the good work you do and it will fail. Honesty dealt with in a tender manner will be a strong bond that will help to hold you together.

The third is the conflict stage. As the relationship progresses and you have been together some time there will be conflicts and disagreements. Those who are able to handle these conflicts with trust and equanimity will be able to keep the relationship going where others would simply flounder. So, learn to handle conflicts and learn form all the ups and downs. A fine achievement Because you have been together for a long time you may well feel your partner takes you for granted or that you are in a rut. The positive side of that coin is you are in a comfortable relationship were you have mutual respect for each other. It may not have the zest and excitement of a new relationship but you have learned to live in contentment with another. This really is a fine achievement and so worthy of praise. It has the reward of a long lasting loving relationship that can only be coveted by many. Allow your partner just to be human not some super-person who you expect must always get it right. If you allow them that courtesy they might then do the same for you!

Article Source: http://www.articlemotron.com

After 876 days...

2007-09-18T00:05:00.000+08:00

When i was questioned.. i tried so hard to ans.. out of 6, i only had 2 rite.. which means.. i failed the test.. i failed terribly.. I felt like an imbecile.. i felt i was fooled.. and its sad to know that only 876 days later.. i dun know u at all.. juZ one last obstacle and i tot we had it all in our hands.. but i guess.. i failed.. i failed this time.. i feel numb.. cuZ it hurts so much that i cant feel anything at all...

Bro's 21st!

2007-09-16T05:46:00.000+08:00

Time realli Flies.. and today is my Bro's 21st!.. haha.. I had a great time over this weekend at his chalet.. meeting up with his friends and chatting up with them! Many were surprised when they met me.. cuZ my Bro and i.. we dun look one bit alike at all.. and there's this friend that commented" how can Alvin have such a pretty sister ?" hahahhahaa...OOps.. (does that mean that he is ugly?? ) anyways..I bought him a Braun Buffel Wallet and i noe it will come into good use cuZ his wallet is like.. darn gone Case la.. and He actually received an xbox 360 for his b'dae from his friends... how nice...!haha.. but i guess my younger bro would be the one who ends up "hogging" it.. since Bro is always away in Camp.. there were Soo many Peeps there.. and it was good that we gathered the family together:) i mean ever since Bro went NS and i started working.. we seldom have time out as a family together like this with all the Cousins and all.. so its Good :)
I wonder who would come for my 21st if i invite them.. i mean.. juZ coming to think of it.. i dun realli have that Big Group of friends..other than my YCS mates!.. but its sad that i already lost contact with some of them.. anyways.. more photos would be up when its ready.. so stay tune..haha.. and i realli wonder who realli spends time to scroll on my blog..other than sister.. :) anyways i Miss u! and we haven had dinner....... soon k?

Good DEED

2007-09-14T01:20:00.000+08:00

Finally! its going to be friday tmr.. its been a bad week.. but i wake up everyday telling myself that tmr will be a better day.. and i've been having this little sorta prayer in mind "Dear GOD... GRANT ME THE SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN AND THE WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE. " It kinda help sometimes..
Today on the way home.. i was kinda sleepy.. and i started to enter la la land while i was on the train.. and when suddenly i opened my eyes.. there's this expectant mom standing not far away from me.. i didnt even think much.. i juZ stood up walked towards her and offered her my seat.. and i felt really good after that.. i'm glad i did sth nice today to make someone's day a little better.. and i believe thats y am special.. and so is everyone in their own ways.
Its the weekend! and i hope it will mark the beginning of a much better week ahead..

Life as a working Adult

2007-09-10T23:01:00.000+08:00

Because i am new.. does that mean i get kicked around? I dun wanna give up juZ yet.. but when things get outta hand.. i will have to do sth bout it.. Dear God.. Pls help.

The Secret...

2007-09-10T00:54:00.000+08:00

ThE Movie.. is AWESOME!

How Sex happens

2007-09-06T00:54:00.000+08:00

Now this ........is funny but TRUE (:...
a smile leads to a laugh...
a laugh leads to a high 5...
a high 5 leads to a hug...
a hug leads to a kiss...
a kiss leads 2 makeout...
a makeout leads 2 finger...
a finger leads to a hand...
a hand leads to a lick...
a lick leads to a suck...
a suck leads 2 a .........
So tell me how many people are you gonna smile at after you heard this cuz sex is like math....
u add the bed...
subtract the clothes...
divide the legs...
leave your solution...
and pray you dont multiply!

haha..

Being Taken for GRANTED

2007-09-04T00:07:00.000+08:00

11:54 pm (ring ring...) Outgoing
Adel : Hello.
XX: (before i could even say more) .. Hello, i call you back in a while
Adel: ok.. Wat you doing now?
XX: I SAID I"LL CALL U BACK IN AWHILE RITE?
Adel: ok.. (hung up)
12:03 (ring ring...) In coming
XX: (again.. before i could even say anything) U WANT TO COME AND SHOUT AT ME JUZ NOW IS IT?
Conversation ended with an sms : "i did not even shout at you.. dun accuse me of doing things i did not do.. and reflect on your behavior jUZ now. Dun always think i'm here for you to shout at."

how on earth did things turn out like this.... i realli wonder....

Weekend over...

2007-09-02T23:58:00.000+08:00

The Weekend's gone.. and tmr's monday again!.. hmm.. its been months since i started work.. and i realli wonder how long more i can go on living this monotonous lifestyle.. hmm.. sometimes i wish i can be somewhere else.. laid back.. chill out.. or even backpacking somewhere.. would be good.. i miss philippines and my friends there!.. Then again.. i remember wat dearie said to me.. work hard now.. and u will reap wat u sow.. so.. i need to draft a plan.. and i need to work realli hard and start saving up for my own adventure. ;)

MUhahahaah! TGIF

2007-09-01T03:37:00.000+08:00

Thank God its FRIDAY!!... finally a day to wind down.. its been a stressful week.. but its well paid off cuZ i've got bestie by me! Sarah brought me to brussels and we had mussels somewhere at Clark quay :) Place was nice.. laid back and all.. except.. we didnt like the high chairs. hahaha... anyways.. after that was KTV at PArty World.. no where else we could go in S'pore.. and so.. we ended up singing our nites away.. :) thanks Bestie.. i had a great Time!

Thoughts..

2007-08-31T01:21:00.001+08:00

fond memories..

NumBer 100th!

2007-08-30T23:19:00.000+08:00

Hahah!.. this is my 100th entry on this blog.. hmm.. and of cuZ many more to come.. today i watched Evan almighty.. haha.. wat a funni show.. Comedy.. is wat i need now.. its helps me get rid of things on my mind..
anyways.. in the movie.. 'GOD' said something really true that touched my heart..' When you pray for patience, God doesnt give you patience, But opportunities for you to learnt to be patient, When you pray to be courageous, God doesnt give u courage, but gives you opportunities to be courageous. When you pray for a closely knitted family, God doesnt bring everyone together, but give you opporunities to keep everyone bonded together.' Juz like when you pray for love, God doesnt just give you love, but he gives u opportunities to find and develope love :) hmmm...

Employed

2007-08-28T23:12:00.000+08:00

Oh man.. Y did the new trainee resigned?!... again adel has to pick up the broken pieces.. but its ok :) I'll work realli Hard.

Agnes.B

2007-08-26T22:03:00.000+08:00

yay! wish granted... hahahha....

Life....

2007-08-25T04:13:00.000+08:00

i surprised dearie today! He's gona further his studies.. and i got him his Crumpler Bag!.. ha.. so he better study hard :) so.. i've granted you your wish.. when r u granting mine??

And.... uh.. i received this realli sad news.. that one of my junior in my sec sch was banged down by a bus while on his way to sch... i feel realli sad for him.. he is barely 16 yrs old.. well, Life's like that.. no one knows wat will happen tmr.. i'm feeling realli upset now.. http://www.straitstimes.com/Video+News/Singapore/STIVodcast_2484.html?playid=2484&type=Singapore

Have we ever tot wat would happen if God decides to take us back home just suddenly.. Life's so unpredictable.. I wanna live every day with no regrets...

Dearie..

2007-08-21T23:39:00.000+08:00

Dearie seemed to be in a world of his own.. i hope he doesnt forget me.. i miss him.

haha!

2007-08-20T22:24:00.000+08:00

My dream... will someone make my dream come true....?

Bestie

2007-08-18T23:45:00.000+08:00

i miss my bestie... RAHhhhhhhhhhh.... i shouldnt be home at this hour.. even daddy found it weird.. its a SATURDAY NITE! i should be partying.. hur

BACK!.. after a long time...

2007-08-16T23:37:00.000+08:00

Hello.. i realli wonder how many ppl come to visit my blog.. but i noe sister sure does once in a while.. i decided to start updating my blog again.. i kinda missed the old skin.. so i changed it back. :) life has been very normal.. started working.. but i haven done anything adventurous yet after i graduated.. but i would. i wanna discover the world.. so i shall work hard now and enjoy the fruits of my labour..

I recently bought corrine May's new album Beautiful Seed.. and i would say its excellent :) Thumbs Up for her! she made me experience her true feelings of laughter and sadness thru her beautiful voice. She nvr fail to inspire me in a way or another :) Back to work tmr again.. i kinda developed this phobia for work.. and i noe its bad.. but i'll hang on.. i'll proof my worth :) and i noe i will. time to get to bed, i've got a battle to fight tmr!

FINALYYYYYYYYYYY am in PARADize.. but then again.. not realli..

2007-03-23T01:19:00.000+08:00

Sister says my Blogs outdated!!
haha.. so am here to update it.. only sister reads it anyways.. haha.. Finally adel has GRADUATED!!.. but then its not all that fun at all.. cuZ its time to trouble bout where to go.. wat companies to write in to.. wat Jobs to take.. blah blah blah.. currently and happy at where i am as a temp.. but of cuZ i hope to find my permanent Job soon.. ADEL wanna GET MARRIED!.. haha SOON !!.. ( ooi.. do sth bout it)... but first, where's ur FAT bank acc?? hur.. anyways.. today i realised anotehr impt lesson in life, which is.. Big Problems are often caused by many small issues in Life.. think bout it.. its realli true.. anyways.. time to go to bed.. its getting late.. no more lazing ard.. adel has got a WORK to do:P

Another another day :l

2007-01-21T00:23:00.000+08:00

adel hasnt fully recovered.. but jUZ got better.. dearie didnt visit me.. i visited him instead.. and i had unhealthy food..like instant noodle.. ... and..... MANGO!!.. haha!.. dearie bought me mangoes today cuZ i said i was craving for them.. how sweet:) heh.. but i noe i cant eat too much.. so i had juZ a bit.. mango is too heaty.. well.. its been stress.. ha... when will i ever say am no longer stress... FYP is coming to an end... BUT.. it juZ isnt yet.. please......... i hope time passes faster... but the irony is i noe i am gonna miss going to sch.. ha..

this aint a joke

2007-01-19T01:18:00.000+08:00

adel hates to be sickly.. the headaches and fever and aching body is driving me crazy..........................

happy happy day

2006-11-26T23:11:00.000+08:00

Been so so stress cuZ of FYP.. FYP sux!.. and i hate my lecturer.. well.. i have to do it.. i have to.. so.. no point hating her.. my friend says learn to like her.. but.. i juZ cant.. hur hur.. anyways.. been realli realli busy with life.. but i'm looking forward to end of FYP! cuZ.. i already have a job waiting for me!.. so exciting.. i would love to work for Esther.. although i noe its not going to be easy.. but.. i will put in my best.:) so i could start saving $$ to start my family:) haha.. give me 2 yrs.. i'll work hard. life's been good.. time realli flies.. happy 562 days dearie! and many more to come.. adel's birthday is coming!!.. i wonder wat would dearie do for me this yr.. and i wonder would anyone else remember?

RARRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

2006-11-21T12:39:00.000+08:00

its been a long long journey... adel's been feeling cranky nowadays.. getting so paranoid bout everything.. haiZ.. how? how can i not feel angry or upset bout it? how can i feel comfortable with it? i trust dearie.. but i dun even wanna take the risk to allow 1% chance of anything else to happen. its not bout trusting.. its bout our comfort level. and the fact is I AM NOT COMFORTABLE with it.. so y must he purposely do it? all he cares is to do things he wants to do.. wat bout me? has he ever tot of how i would feel? nvr.. and it always boils down to the word of me being sensitive, paranoid.. blah blah blah..... i dunnoe wat i am feeling now.. my mind is not at peace...... i am upset.

the story ends....

2006-09-30T17:28:00.000+08:00

Tequila is gone... i have no choice but to give tequila away again.. cuZ daddy is furious bout them barking and barking and everyone at home haven been sleeping well... tequila is such a nice and obedient dog.. i realli wished i had a choice.. but the dog gave me enough trouble.. the moment when i gave her away.. i cried.. i'm so upset.. if onli i have my own home and own space. so that i neednt give tequila away.. its like i lost a friend.. a close friend who i tok to every nite.. who i share my quilt with everynite.. and who i cry to when i am upset.. and i'm sure.. snowy misses her too..i'm realli upset.. i didnt wish things would turn out this way.. a;so i pray and hope that all will be fine for dearie and i.. he wants to pursue his dreams to fly.. all of the sudden.. and although i feel that its is very dangerous.. i didnt say anything bout stopping him from doing so.. all because i wanted him to do the things he want to do and not feel tie down in anyway.. i've nvr given up on dearie.. but y is it that he always reconsiders the relationship when sth goes wrong.. we are supposed to go thru them together.. and all i need is for him to love me, in good times and in bad.. i dun want him to throw me away or think that my letting me go and be with someone else would solve the problem. i'm his gf.. not a trophy.. or anything else. i juZ need him to understand that i will love him.. and i will try my best to be an understanding gf... at all times.. y isnt he sure of wat he wants all of the sudden.. work and relationship are 2 different elements... i'm sure we can work sth out. i love him.. so much..

my short journey with Tequila....

2006-07-16T23:04:00.000+08:00

She is tequila.. and i lOVE her.. she's such an obedient jack russell that i've nvr seen.. and.. yea.. she's amazing.. but.. snowy is such a horny dog... and i have to separate them... and obviously, i wasnt up to the job.. and i had a sleep less nite last nite.. so.. i decided to give tequila away.. sad decision.. but the best solution.. and today dearie and i sent tequila to its new owner.. SARAH!! hahaha... now.. i do hope that sarah takes good care of my tequila.. i miss her.. lots lots and lots..

i wish..

2006-06-26T12:59:00.000+08:00

i wish i could sleep forever, so that i will nvr wake up..
i wish i could dream forever, so watever will be will be wat i wanted..
i wish i could nvr drop a tear ever, so that other's heart wouldn't be broken..
i wish i could turn back time a little, so that my life would be a whole lot different..
i wish....
There is so many things in our lives that we wish for.. but sometimes, it juZ doesnt work that way..

Life After death..

2006-06-19T23:56:00.000+08:00

I've always wondered what would it be like when i die.. who would be at my funeral.. and wat happens after that.. will i juZ leave this world forever? or would there be life after death? and i mean.. everlasting life. i've always been taught since young that when i die.. i will go to heaven, and heaven is a place where i will be where God is.. and i will have my own room of everything that i wanted.. will i still have feelings when i die? will my soul be ard when i die? will i still be upset? will i cry? or will i be happy everyday? will there be nothing to worry about? will there be love? will i get to have a family again? i dun wanna be lonely when i die.. ha.. well.. just some thoughts running thru my head... esp when i'm kinda bored during my hols..

2006-06-19T23:45:00.000+08:00

The tide has juz simmered down.. i'm glad that all is fine now.. been realli sad the past few days.. i start to wonder wat is it that i realli want in life.. and i've always had the same ans.. God has spoken to me thru ppl.. many ppl.. he Gives me ans to my questions always.. thru my friends who were there for me when i needed to be consoled.. and thru my conversations every nite with him before i sleep.. i came to realisation bout alot of things in Life.. and i jus hope that all will be fine.. someday when we look back at ourselves.. we might juZ realise that all those times and issues that we argued about ain't that impt afterall.. because diff people have different way of handling diff situations.. and perhaps for us, arguements and quarrels act as a tool for us to understand each other thru the hard way. i jus hope that this wouldnt bring us down.. but make us stronger.. in each passing day. This is the last week of my hols! am gonna have a real good rest.. and there i go again! back to school! and soon.. i'll grad.. time juZ flies..

HEy hEY HEY!!

2006-06-02T14:08:00.000+08:00

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wat a DAY....... =X

2006-06-01T00:49:00.000+08:00

well.. i wouldnt say i had a great day today...and i wouldnt say i has a terrible day either.. well.. its juZ a day full of both fortunate and unfortunate events.. hmm first things first is the morning.. the tuition agency called! heh! i've got an assignment.. which was pretty fast considering that i've onli registered myself last nite.. yep.. so its a good thing!.. then i went to sze ming's house.. juZ to chill relax.. watch dvd.. like wat everyone would do during their leisure time... well... then i decided that i wanted to surprise dearie at his camp today!.. so i took a cab down to his camp.. waited for him outside.. but the longer i waited.. the more i had a very feeling bout it.. so at 5.20pm.. i started calling him.. but to no avail....... he nvr ans all of them.. haiZ.. then when i waited and waited.. i saw dearie passed by me... within a split second.. he dissappeared! oh gosh... he cycled OFF!!!! i was bout to cry.. i didnt noe he cycled to work today.. and all i wanted was to surprise him and things juZ didnt turn out the way it should... i felt so so upset... then, i had a prob.. i didnt have enough cash with me.. and i needed to take a cab cuZ i was kinda lost.. so next was to find a POSB machine.. but... there aint any! haiZ.. so i jus stood there.. and saw many many cabs went by.. and at that moment juZ felt so irritated and angry and upset and .... haiZ... then i decided i will flag for a cab and ask the uncle if they accept mastercard.. and yea.. i did.. and guess wat.. the cab that stopped was my uncle!... i guess God must have took pity on me... and sent me a saviour... so uncle drove me to dearie's place without me having to pay a cent... and there i was.. at dearie's place.. hmm still dunnoe wat to feel.. both angry.. upset... Argh... it wasnt a nice feeling that all i could say.. well.. it wasnt anybody's fault.. if there was.. the most was that dearie didnt ans his call thats all.. but i cant blame him either.. cuZ his phone was on silent.. well.. and that led on to another untold story.... haiZ... wat a day...

The Hols Are Here!!

2006-05-30T22:04:00.000+08:00

i've officially completed one block on semester 5 and its the hols again!.. well.. dunnoe if its a wise choice to quit adidas at this point of time of the hols.. but i guess i had enough of adidas..currently looking for another job, sth more flexible.. probably tuition.. well.. i spent the whole day at home today.. clearing and tidying my room... wat a boring day.. i guess dearie's rite.. i will be bored to death if i were to stay home to look after the kids and prepare dinner and do house work next time.. haha.. its juZ full of contradictions... when i'm so busy and all i juZ wished i could stay home to rest.. but now.. am onli home for a day.. and am reAlli bored.. hmm well.. i'll juZ take it as a well deserved rest from all the early mornings that i had during the sch term and attachment.. hmm.. its coming june.. time is passing so fast.. half of the yr is gone... well.. there's good and bad.. the good is.. that means i'm going to grad soon!! and i can look for a permanent job.. start my money saving plan.. the bad is.. i'm getting old!! haha.. hmm.. counting as the days go by...

LIFE in reality

2006-05-18T22:36:00.000+08:00

today, i've come to realised alot of things.. i've come to realised that there is much much more to life.. life isnt a nice picture that i've painted.. there are much much more to it.. given a choice i would rather lead a simple life.. juZ me and whoever God has plan for me to spend the rest of my life with.. and i've came to believe that yes, ppl do change in time to come.. there isnt such a thing as a life time promise.. there isnt such a thing as forever.. other than life after death; that's forever. Because of ppl i see and things that i hear, i dun wanna lose faith in the things that i used to believe.. i dun wanna dash my dreams of the pretty picture that i've painted.. but sometimes.. i cant help... will someone enlighten me?

375 days.....

2006-05-04T00:02:00.000+08:00

my eyes hurts.. my heart aches... and my mind wonders...

slack day..

2006-04-27T00:41:00.000+08:00

wow.. time flies.. and attachment's over.. i'm offcially a senior! haha.. a yr 3 student in sch! oh man.. i feel so old.. it seems like i juZ joinedTDS not long ago.. and now.. i'm already in the last yr of my studies.. i will definitely miss sch.. i will miss my friends! i will miss everything.. ah! the canteen food!hahahaha!! hmm.. there are many changes in sch.. esp the block teaching.. i feel that its kinda rush and i dunnoe if it'll work.. but we will try.. to make it work.. hmm.. other than that.. i guess all i have to worry bout is my FYP and wat am i gonna do.. well i realli hope i can find the time to cope with my studies and my part time Job.. tuitoring as well... hmm.. juZ so many things that i wanna achieve right now..
today.. i planned to go over to the driving centre to apply for my PDL.. but there were last min changes.. so i went to give tuition.. and will go tmr instead.. after tuition, i went to the super market to buy ingredients.. cuZ i had the sudden urge to bake CoOkieS!! haha.. and i did.. cookies were Yum YuM!! but they were kinda too sweet.. so i shall cut down on the sugar used infuture:) today snowy was kinda cute.. it started to pour heavily outside and he there was thunder and all.. he was scared and had nowhere to run.. so he juZ headed for his carrier that dearie bought for him.. and stayed there for quite a while.. took a few pics of him while he was in there searching for comfort.. kinda cute.. haha :) well.. was wondering if i would meet dearie today.. but in the end we didnt.. wasnt exactly upset of sth.. it would juZ be nice if i could hear his voice for a while.. and not long later dearie smsed me.. dearie.. thank u for the SMS.. that's all i could ask for.. nth else:) if u were to make up for all those times u were not here.. that would be a lifetime.. so.. Marry me! that would be wat i'm asking for.. :) but that would only happen in a few yrs down the road.. we'll be.. as planned :)

the awakening Call...

2006-04-20T19:10:00.000+08:00

Accept the Person for Who he is and not wat u want him to be.. No one is Prefect. myself included...

an extremely long weekend...

2006-04-17T08:33:00.000+08:00

Oh man.. Good friday, holy Saturday.. Easter Sunday has came and gone... and dearie has finally came back from Cameron Highlands.. it was an extremely long weekend not becuz of the PH.. but an extremely long weekend cuZ dearie's not around here with me.. adel feels empty within...Well It doesnt matter.. cuZ he is now back.. life has been alrite.. and i hope it stays like this.

just go away...

2006-04-10T13:03:00.000+08:00

adel didnt make it to work today.
headache was killing me.
body was aching badly.
my heart too was aching badly..
its jUZ those days that adel feels wrong.. and keeps thinking bout things that ain't gonna matter much by fact.. but totally suck at it cuZ it matters by heart.
lesson learnt: dun ask even if u really wanna noe.. cuZ the heart is gonna bleed when it isnt wat u wanna hear. yes it is affecting me but i am pretending it doesn't.. juZ wanna let it go away... just go away...

Life...

2006-04-10T00:26:00.000+08:00

life is weird... its too complex to understand and moreover be understood.. when we dun noe something.. we strive hard desperately to wanna know the truth.. and when we do find out the truth.. we realised that it isn't wat we wanna know and wat we wanna hear.. how complicating.. can someone help?well.. dearie will be upset if he is gonna see this.. i hope that this will not affect what he will share with me in future... cuZ we nvr hide things.. i was silent on my way home... cuZ juZ pondering bout wat was said and all.. and trying to recompose myself.. anyways.. wats past is past.. its ok to leave scars .. cuZ that shows that u've lived a life.. so.. adel's gonna listen and juZ let things go.. :) and everything will be fine. happy 352 days as of Now dearie.. i love u!

watS Up with OuR Hair!!

2006-04-06T22:49:00.000+08:00

US in our new hair cut! haha

upset..

2006-04-06T08:42:00.000+08:00

when i woke up this morning.. i missed dearie.. and i felt quite upset.. cuZ of sth that happened last nite.. i hope he will nvr do it again.. cuZ it breaks my heart to realli know wats going on but being told sth else.. although its a trivial matter.. it says alot... well the problem was solved .. and i tell myself not to think bout it anymore.. well.. no matter wat dearie did.. i still love him. very much.

UH OH...

2006-04-04T08:43:00.000+08:00

OH i forgot to blog bout dearie's haircut..haha.. it was an experience man.. dearie juZ looks so cute!! haha... high slope square top..:P hahahahahahahhahaa... i can't stop laughing.. well.. i will go learn how to cut hair.. and i will help dearie cut his hair nicely in future.. for now..juZ be my hair model for training.. haha.. well.. its juZ all these things that we do together that makes us stay so close to each other.. and... all in all..i love him.

countdown...

2006-04-04T08:28:00.000+08:00

haha.. adel misses sch!!! omg... i drat work.. its getting too monotonous.. i miss my friends.. auddy.. for her hugs, sarah.. for her whiny behaviour.. james..for his cranky jokes.. nelson..for his er... i dunnoe..Quanxy...for her scoldings!! hahahhaha! and many other ppl.. i miss sch FOOD! hahaha... evryday at work.. its so sian to go for lunch.. cuZ u gotta walk for 10-15 mins under the bloody hot sun.. and its torturing.. so when my colleagues and i are lazy.. we would ta bao food from the canteen.. from Oily uncle. Yes, its OILY uncle... cuZ the food he cooks are all Damn Oily.. and i often get tummy aches after that.. haha.. well.. bout 2 more weeks to go for attachment.. hmm.. when i am beginning to get use to the environment and people.. i have to leave.. quite sad..well.. i can always come back.. i'm gonna go back to sch.. work hard and do well.. :) oh i recently had a hair cut at fox.. and now... adel look like some innocent sch gal.. which is so not me.. so.. am gonna go back for another one.. anyway its free! haha.. well.. everything has been good.. life has almost gone back to normal.. but daddy still ain't toking to ade.. i dunnoe y.. well juZ let him be.. btw.. happy 345 days dearie.. :) adel Luvs U! well.. i juZ browsed thru dearie's friendster.. hmm.. i wonder if there is a reason y dearie nvr post any of our photos together.. quite sad to not see my pic in there though..

Marche!!!

2006-03-29T23:56:00.000+08:00

HAppy Birthday Dearie!

2006-03-28T00:25:00.000+08:00

juZ a few mins ago.. it was still dearie's 21st Birthday! hur hur.. adel had a good good day and dearie too!!! its his birthday!!!! 21st big day! well dearie has entered into another stage of his life.. i'm glad everything is fine now.. and i thank dearie.. for everything... now.. before i be sensitive or before i start getting jealous, angry, or upset.. i will definitely think thrice... and i will nvr forget wat dearie told me on the 26th march.. the words that he said.. the things that he had reassured me with.. :) thank u dearie..
A little reminder from Me 2 U!
So often it seems
there just aren't
enough hours in the day
to accomplish everthing
we have to do and still Squeeze in
some special time for us.
Remember when we were first together,
and we would Talk, and kiss,
and do whatever we wanted
for as long as we wanted?
I wish it Could always be that way
But no matter How complicated or crazy
our days get, one simple, timeless truth
is forever in my heart- i aDore U.
Thank u dearie for the little note on the mini bookmark.. i love it... realli.. very much. more pics to come.. when dearie uploads them... for now.. adel needs to sleep.

Thank you.

2006-03-21T21:35:00.000+08:00

i haven been updating my blog for realli realli long.. so i decided to do so today.. change my blog's URL cuZ my friend has been having difficulties accessing to my blog.. well.. the last 2 weeks of adel's life hasnt been realli Good, but i pray that it will be better:) all the argueing and explaining and misunderstanding has made adel very very tired.. i nvr wanna feel this way again.. work is getting stress.. have been facing excel sheets every day.. can be quite frustrating sometimes.. adel felt much much better today.. although i had some morning blues... haha.. its juZ the moody and sad feeling when i wake up in the morning thinking i have to go to work.. and many other things that i've been thinking bout.. have been having heart aches.. every breath that i take.. it feels painful.. but adel feels much better now.. and i believe everything is going to get back to normal very soon.. hmm.. today.. while at work.. i got into a conversation with this friend of mine who is in NZ now.. well.. it was a long good chat.. was quite surprise when he said that i meant alot to him and tat he misses me alot.. well.. perhaps thru Desmond.. i understand my situation better.. maybe no one might noe what i am trying to say.. but Thanks anyway.. cuZ i've learnt sth today.. sth quite important that will help me move on..
YAY!!! am gonna be able to get to see my dearie tmr.. i miss him! very much..

testing

2006-03-21T15:32:00.000+08:00

123

adel's sad day...

2006-02-23T01:59:00.000+08:00

adel is sad cuZ she lost her wallet today.. hmm sad.. sad.. ended my day in the NPC to make a report bout my lost wallet.. hmm.. there are so many things that i have inside my wallet.. scold me stupid.. scold me watever.. but.. i'm not sad cuZ of the ic..DBS cards.. but.. sad for the other things.. like my photos with dearie.. my movie tics w dearie, entry tics to the dog show and other impt namecards.. cuZ.. there are juZ some things that can't be replaced... i thank dearie for coming to pick me up and sending me to the police post to make a report and all.. and szeming for being there. dearie.. i wonder wat i would be without u.. well.. daddy didn't seem to care if i able to get home or not.. he juZ presummed.. hmm.. well.. i realli thank u dearie.. so so so much that i can't define how much.. i love u dearie..

Happy 300 days dearie!!!

2006-02-17T22:59:00.000+08:00

yay!!! i'm officially done with all my assignments and am going for my 2 months attachment!!! omg.. time realli realli flies.. so much so that even before i could realise anything.. dearie and i are 300 days together!! .. these 300 days are not juz any 300 days.. these 300 days holds so much of US in this relationship.. and how much we love each other.. and soon these 300 days would be 3000 days.. and forever.. dearie came over to my place.. and we took daddy's car!! to get paint!! cuZ sunday.. dearie and i are gonna paint my room! my fav colour!! green:) after that dearie came over to my place.. slack for a while.. and he went home.. before he did.. we had a long long talk at the void deck.. like we use to do last time.. kinda missed those days.. hmm.. am working tmr.. omg.. sth that i realli drat and hate to do! haiz.. well... i still have to...

HappY Valentine's day!!

2006-02-14T23:16:00.000+08:00

today is Valentine's day! today is a day when couples spend time together, where they celebrate the love that they share:) and no exception, dearie and i did too!.. dearie got me a Bear bear from precious thots.. and its cute! and i sprayed davidoff on it! wahah!!.. and so i could hug it to sleep everynite.. and i tot i wouldnt recieve any flowers from dearie.. but i still did! dearie gave me a daisy.. although it wan't a sunflower, neither was it a rose.. but a daisy.. i love it still the same, cuZ dearie got it for me.. hmm.. i got dearie a shirt from adidas, the one that we went from store to store to search and couldn't find any.. but still.. i had my ways!.. I got it for dearie.. cuZ its sth that he wanted :) well, we didn't realli went out for dinner or anything.. we juZ spent time together.. cuZ we wanted to avoid the crowd too.. so.. yep.. anyways, it doesn't matter, cuZ with dearie.. everyday is valentine's day! hmm this semester is going to end soon.. and i'm 2 more days to freedom!! before my attachment starts.. well.. i hope to do well, i hope to not dissapoint my lecturers.. and most importantly, myself.

for this, i am closed.

2006-02-12T01:15:00.000+08:00

i deleted the previous entry.. cuZ i felt it was bad.. i read it again and again... i was putting myself in dearie's shoes.. i guess dearie would be upset if he read it.. well.. i dun want him to feel that he can't do the things that he wanna do.. all i wanted to do was let him noe wat i felt.. but i guess its ok.. alrite. peroid. bed time.

Cold Friday..

2006-02-11T01:17:00.000+08:00

today was a cold cold day.. ha.. didn't go to sch for basic photo.. but went for psycho lecture cuZ was afraid that i could not chalk my attendance to 85% thats y.. ha.. then after that went to meet dearie to go for archery.. i tot i brought my shoes.. but i didn't.. and still tot my friends took it away! ha.. so i called home to make sure it was still there.. heh.. then asked daddy if he could pick me up.. cuZ i needed to reach dearie's place by 6.30pm.. so.. yea.. daddy came.. and we made our way there... archery was alrite today.. i realised it was much easier to shoot with my left arm:) hmm.. now next is when am i gonna take the course and join the membership.. hmm.. i want to.. i realli want to.. but now is not the time yet.. i have too many things to handle at the moment.. so.. i doubt i can.. especially with all the submissions coming up.. and... my driving too!.. so yea.. i'll take a step at a time.. then things will be much easier that way.:)

sleepy Monday....

2006-02-06T23:57:00.000+08:00

Zzzz... sleepy monday! hahaa!!.. i didn't have class in the morning today.. but i woke up early cuZ my swimming Bud sms me!! heee.. haven met her for a long long time.. so we met! i went swimming! but.. there was no sun.... and it even started to rain.. ha.. so we went to have brunch instead.. i missed the chicken wings at the pool! yum yum.. ( seems like i was more interested in the chicken wingS then swimming) hmm soon the rain stopped. Sze ming went to sch.. and i went home! played with snowy.. then made my way to sch.. i fell asleep on the bus... i felt so so so tired.. then went for psycho class, as usual, it was boring.. and i fell asleep too... oh no.. adel is a bad student.. how could i??? but still, i did. all i was thinking was for class to end early then i can go find dearie!!... dearie wanted to come over to play with snowy again.. then we left his place.. and when we got to level 1.. i told dearie didn't wanna go home.. so dearie and i made our way back up.. ha!.. how dumb... but dearie was very nice.. he told me it was ok.. so.. there we were, HOME! and we decided to watch NarniA.. its quite interesting.. and a little sad.. so after watching.. dearie put me in a cab.. and i came home.. well.. although it was a short time that Dearie and i spent together, i enjoyed my day still, cuZ he completes my day. always. so.. thank u dearie.. and today.. i found out that dearie actually does read my blog. :) no doubt, am happy bout it! hmm.. now gtg do some work before i Zzzz.. thursday Submission!!!!

HApPeniNgS!!!!

2006-02-06T00:36:00.000+08:00

heee heee heee heee heeee.. i love today!!! cuZ there is juZ so much so so so much to talk about!! hmm.. today when i woke up.. i went to church... then didn't realli wanna go my aunty's place.. cuZ i was afraid i would be bored and didnt noe wat to do there.. so i tot i would make my way to the range to shoot archery... but called dearie.. and he said he would end early!! so.. i decided to juZ go my aunty's place.. then meet him later.. so dearie and i met in town!.. then we decided that we wanna go see westies stuff! so.. he walked into the Pets lovers centre in plaza Sing.. ha.. it all started from there... dearie wanted to get snowy a carrier.. so we could bring him out next time in his car.. but there wasn't a suitable one.. ha.. we spent quite sometime there.. discussing where and wat to get.. then i saw this bed-like thing.. which i tot snowy would love! cuZ he has been jumping on my bed pretty often... ha.. but we could onli get the carrier at simei, so we tot we could find snowy's bed there too! so.. dearie and i went home first.. got the car.. and there we go! made our way to simei!! we got a little lost.. cuZ apparently adel is not very good at maps.. and i couldnt realli figure out where was the exists, roads and all.. but after a few roundabouts.. we found our way!! to the pets safari at simei! then we went there.. sadly.. couldnt find snowy's bed.. but dearie was telling me: " okay! dun worry dearie! we'll go get it k" so we quickly bought the carrier.. and left for town! back to Plaza Sing! where we saw the bed!.. heh... then dearie and i could finally eat dinner peacefully.. yum yum.. i was hungry... heh.. then dearie drove me home with all the barang barang.. hee.. snowy was so excited when we got home!.. he was barking and wagging his tail!.. sadly.. snowy loved his cage.. the carrier.. but not the bed... i went all the way back.. to buy him that but he dun like.. but its ok.. i believe he will get used to it soon.. rather than sleeping on the floor.. ( hey! thats good life k) for a dog.. to have a bed.. heh.. dearie and i brought snowy out for a short walk.. then dearie went home.. well.. thats my day... so muh happenings.. all in all i wanna thank dearie.. for all that he has done for me.. not onli today, but every other day.. love u dearie.. love u to bits.. cuZ u nvr fail to warmth my heart with ur actions and the things u do:) btw.. sarah.. reading this? enjoy!!

steamboat after steamboat..

2006-02-04T23:36:00.000+08:00

:) i enjoyed my day! today had psycho test.. die die.. i dunnoe how i will fair.. but.. my hopes are not high.. heh!.. i juZ hope to do well for my quizes so i wouldnt do that bad overall if i fail my test! after sch and all.. all of us went over to sarah's place for steamboat! and her dog bite my finger!!! so painful... :`\... hur hur.. steamboat was full!!.. after steamboat.. we sent audrey off to edwin's place.. then we headed for east coast! had Ice- cream! my fav:) dearie was teaching us how to play poker.. and not long after we got bored... so we went to play some games, small little stalls by the beach there.. reminds me of younger days.. dearie won a minnie sharpener.. and he gave it to me..soon after .. we left.. although i was with dearie for a few hours today.. but i missed him.. i thought dearie could maybe perhaps send sarah back first.. then i could be with him a little longer.. all i wanted was to spend a little more time with dearie.. but i guess he didn't noe.. and will nvr noe.. and it seemed to sound ridiculous to him when i said no when he said he wanted to send me back first.. so.. i didn't say anything.. i am not angry or unhappy.. juZ upset cuZ i wanted to spend sometime with dearie.. thats was all i asked for.. well.. i will be the understanding gf still that dearie needed his rest.. if he were to send sarah home first.. then wouldnt be like making a big roundabout... so.. i didn't wanna say anything:) but i was wrong to juZ keep quiet like that too.. so.. i would like to apologise to dearie.. and that i love him! loads!.. hope he calls me soon.. when he gets home... i'm a so not understanding person.. my bad.. :(

mY bad...

2006-02-04T00:09:00.000+08:00

dear bloggy... i made a grave mistake today...i felt realli bad.. to have doubted someone who is so dear to me.. sorry to have said things so harshly... or rather.. in such a bad manner... always.. i juZ need to say them out.. not because i dun believe u.. but because i need your assurance.. even if its small little stuff... i will feel better always if i let it out. by telling u..and i do feel much much better now!. thanks dearie. for being always so patient and loving towards this paranoid gf that u have. you might not read or even see this.. but still i hope u will not take them to heart. love u to bits dearie.. goodnite.

i am 2 weeks to DoomsDay!!!!

2006-02-02T10:43:00.000+08:00

hur hur.. two more weeks before sch semester ends.. i realli wonder... time is passing realli realli fast.. and after attachment.. i will be in yr 3 of my studies!!.. well.. i hope to do well in sch.. and of cuZ many other things.. hmm.. had some dispute at home again... and i thereafter come to a conclusion that... i realli can't be at home for a long time... cuZ when i do.. sth will happen.. home has became a place where i dun realli feel like going.. hmm or rather.. its how i feel when i am at home..juZ wats wrong?? i do not noe.. God.. i need help.. i pray everyday.. for peace.. i pray everyday to not be upset about things.. but i still do... i pray everyday to not cry... wt happened to the ade that is bubbly and cheerful?! well.. should tok bout sth else...hmm bout 2 days ago.. i went archery with dearie and his family.. it was fun once again!.. it builds my determination to get my grouping... but i realised that i'm actually left eye dominant... but i am a right hander!! that makes it diff. and i will have to decide if i would wanna use a left hand bow.. or train my right eye to become my master eye.. am going on friday again.. i hope to do better!!:) hmm gtg for my consultation!!! thats bout all for now! btw.. i miss u dearie..

all about u

2006-02-01T17:35:00.000+08:00

its bout 5.30pm now... hmm.. am waiting for dearie to call me.. or reply my sms.. hmm i guess he is busy.. but then again.. it wouldnt take a minute to juZ send me an sms.. hmm... dearie didnt contact me the whole day.. i hope i am not forgotten..

LunaR New YeaRs eve

2006-01-28T18:37:00.000+08:00

today is lunar new years eve. hmm.. i stayed at home the whole day.. then brought snowy out for a walk.. then was tidying my room.. want it to look spick and span for new year!.. excited bout next thurs!! having steamboat session at home!! with sarah.. aud.. and.. of cuZ dearie.. hmm.. wanted to kinda spend Lunar new years eve with dearie.. cuZ i didnt get to spend new years eve.. neither am i going to spend Vdae with dearie.. cuZ dearie has DUTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!haiz.. saddened... and i noe that these few days i wouldnt see him at all cuZ he has lotsa visitings to do... but then dearie has to wake up early tmr... so... he didn't want to.. well.. its ok.. although i feel kinda sad and dissapointed but its ok.. dun realli wanna say anything that will upset dearie during cNY.. dearie needs his rest. he always wake up very early... so yea.. i guess i wouldn't see him.. till dunnoe when.. hmm.. going to aunty janet's place later for steamboat!! Yum Yum.. can't wait!!

maD about wEstieS..

2006-01-27T00:32:00.000+08:00

Wee!! thats's Snowy.. its my 2nd doggie... but i still love dexter most.. snowy is too quiet.. but dexter is active and more fun to play with!... dexter is more intelligent too.. haha... well.. today was a better day:) did my retail design presentation and i did it well!.. without dearie's help.. i dun think i would have succeeded.. to.. i have my baby dearest to thank!.. yeps.. went to sch today.. lecture was 3 hours.. i waited for a total of 2 hrs and 55 mins.. before i could delivery my 5 min presentation juZ before class ends.. wat a waste of my time... yay! tmr is friday.. and i love fridays cuZ its when i noe i get to see dearie!!!! i miss him.. to bits! waiting patiently for dearie's call now when he is done with his things, he will call me..:) thats bout all for today.

Busy Busy..

2006-01-26T01:51:00.000+08:00

Haven been updating my blog again... hmm.. been busy with sch.. lotsa submissions and all.. we had a little arguement.. about wat i dunnoe.. maybe its juZ those days that both of us can't realli tok.. hmm.. dearie was not in camp... and he gave me a shock when he told me he was home.. i tot wat happened to him.. then i teared again.. i noe dearie hates it when i cry.. he hates it.. and i hate it too! but well its something from inside me.. i am worried that something did happened to him.. cuZ dearie took long to reply my msgs and all too.. well i guess i love him.. thats y.. i dun want anything bad to happen to him.. all i want is for him to be safe and sound.. and i am afraid of losing dearie.. very much afraid. and i guess that explains all the tears behind.. i must stop it.. stop!!! no more crying ade.. u've been doing so.. too much. and dear Lord, bless and guide us as a couple, to bring us thru every obstacle that we face, make us stay strong together, as we journey together towards our destiny. i will tell God this. every single day.

SunShine after the RaiN...

2006-01-20T00:44:00.000+08:00

i met dearie today!!! hmm.. and yea.. he is the onli person who can make me feel at peace... the onli person who could make my heartaches go away... and when i say heart aches, i realli mean heart ache.. is it me? or is it really like that? everytime when sth seemed to have gone wrong.. my heart aches for it.. every breath that i take.. it hurts... juZ hurts so much.. and the onli remedy for these heart aches, is to be beside dearie... its when i noe that everything is alright. all things are fine.. then i wouldn't feel that way...although dearie always reassures me and all that everything is fine.. i will still feel this way... till the very moment when i see him... the pain would jUZ dissappear.. well.. i have been praying..asking God to take away.. all those piercings... take away all those troubles and worries.. sometimes it does help.. but sometimes, it doesn't... i juZ hope that i will no longer feel this way anymore, because.. i noe that if this goes on.. its no good. so i'll pray hard. i could feel the stress from sch already.. bad bad.. BUCK up! aDe!. stop playing already!!!! haiZ..

you are nothing short of my everything!

2006-01-08T01:29:00.000+08:00

today was a good day!... hmm everything is well at home already cuZ i haven been home.. see... as i said.. when i'm not home, there's peace.. maybe i should move out someday.. hur hur hur.. well was in sch from 9 in the morning till 3pm!!! had to complete the CPM network before leaving... well sch was alrite.. but sarah and i were super hungry!!! super!!!... we went to the vending machine outside the studios to buy cup noodles.. but to find that there were no chopsticks!! luckily we have our nice lecturer doreen who got them for us.. then we went down and realised that jupiter cafe was open! so i ate fries.. and saraah.. her chief's salad.. haha.. we started toking.. and saraah suddenly mentioned bout studying overseas.. hmm.. and i still feel that i am not someone who would be able to leave everyone i have here to go overseas to study...moreover, that was nvr in my plan.. hmm but well everyone have their own opinions and way of life.. am juZ leading mine... saraah acc me to wait for daddy to come and pick me up! ha! so nice...i went to give tuition... i was putting in alot of effort and patience in teaching jeryl... then wanted to go visit dexter after tuition, but dearie called already.. so i went to meet him!.. watched elizabethtown!! it was nice! a little sad.. a little confusing.. but still nice!.. quite touching... i cried.. i little.. haha! silly me.. then dearie sent me off in a cab.. came home took a shower.. and am here.. toking to dearie juz now.. yay! am going to join dearie in archery soon!! quite excited! and oh yea.. dun worry dearie.. i wouldnt leave s'pore... moreover leave U!.. remember, we made plans and had set goals, now its juz waiting for the time to come to fufill them one by one.. well.. am going to zzzz am tired.. *ywanz*

its not a good start afterall

2006-01-02T20:55:00.000+08:00

hmmm... i ran away from home today.. juZ felt that whenever i'm home... there would always bound to be some friction.. here and there... hmmm... i felt realli angry today... y would i have such a brother?? who is so unreasonable.. and such a father who seems to juZ hate me so much.... always putting me down and always presuming that everything i do is wrong! i'm sad... i left house.. i went to my grandma's place... stayed there the whole afternoon.. brought dexter doggie out for a walk... hmmm..... i cried again today... i juZ felt realli angry.. that y daddy could juZ shout at me for no nothing reason without knowing wat is going on....... haiZ.. it started to rain.... i cried my way to church... wanted to find somewhere where i can juZ sit there.... calm myself down... i wanted so much to call dearie.. but... i dun want to.. cuZ i dun want him to worry.. i dun want him to noe that i cried.. he is in malaysia.. suppose to enjoy... i dun wanna spoil his mood.... wanted to call sarah.. but i guess she would be busy with her re test..and i didn't want her to worry too... dearie.. i miss u.. so so so much... i tot i would see u today.... haiZ.. i shouldn't have even stayed at home in the first place.. i realised that onli when i leave home early in the morning and come back home late at nite.. then everything at home would be fine...cuZ staying at home juZ saddens my day sometimes... dearie.. i realli wish i could see u now..

2006!!!!!! here i come!!!

2006-01-01T01:21:00.000+08:00

bye 2005!!!!!!! and lets welcome 2006!!!!!!!! weeeeeeee!!!!! hmm.. 2005 has come to an end.. now.. am sorta doing a reflection on the happenings in this year.. 2005 was a good year for me.. and i hope 2006 would be too!.. time realli realli flies.. and i'm going to be 19! ha.. the tot that i juZ had my 18th birthday!.. now.. i would like to list down my new yr resolutions.. 1) to work hard in sch strive for my As* 2) to be by my friends whenever they need me 3) to be a good daughter and sister at home 4) to love dearie with all my heart mind and soul, to always be there for him and bring this relationship to a higher level, to support him thru it all, to continue to hold on to his hand as we continue this journey of ours till we reach our destination. 5) to a closer to God. There are juZ so many things that i wanna thank God for, and unending praise that i wanna give him... i haven been very active in church ever since i left the choir, and YCS, i gained freedom, but i almost lost faith.. almost.. i hope to draw myself closer to him, as i journey my life... hmm.. thats bout all for resolutions.. lets tok bout today!.. i slept so so so much today.. rest alot!.. was supposed to join aud, sarah and my gang for count down! but.. i didn't... stayed at home the whole day.. wanted to get some work done.. but.. i realised i lost my whole stack of fulscap paper!.. uh oh.. dunnoe how i'm going to complete my retail design journal.. hmm.. then i drag and drag.. realli waana do sth!! but i'm in such a holiday mood... cant realli get much serious work done! so.. i decided to do sth.. not so serious.. like... hahhahaa continue our album!!!.. where dearie and i left off! i promise to surprise him when he comes back on monday!.. he is in malaysia now.. received a few calls from him.. and am glad to know that he enjoyed himself!.. i compiled all our photos and heh heh.. and did some photoshopping! guess my skills are improving! hmm.. lastly.. before i turn in tonite... i'm gonna email dearie a letter! :) hee not gonna blog it here.. cuZ its sth from adel to ken, not to everyone la! :P alrites.. thats bout all! niteZ bloggy..

happy holidays!

2005-12-31T02:24:00.000+08:00

wee!!!!!!!!.. went photo shoot today with dearie at sentosa!!!! it was fun looking out for kids playing! hee... and the highlight of the day is.. dearie and i are going to take make over pics at a studio! hahahaa.. exciting eh.. well.. dearie and i were juZ talking bout marriage next time... talking bout wats going to happen and all.. and then a lady from the wedding studio boutique walked out.. approached us, ask if we were married and wanna take wedding photos!.. wahhahaa.. i was so paiseh.. realli wanted to siam her.. but dearie thought it would be a good thing to do to mark our anniversary! so.. i agreed! wee!.. after that we continue to take pics.. went to clark quay... then when we exited, we realised we came out at the wrong one.. so we wanted to U turn.. then when dearie was trying to trick me to going down the escalator thats coming upwards, i freaked!!!!!!! cuZ i saw a cat charging at us.. i scream!!!!!!!!!! wahahahahaaa
omg.. i screamed real real real LOUD!.. i was thinking.. poor cat.. must have lost its way into the station.. and finally made its way outta the station... but i more poor thing.. cuZ i got scared by that iiritating grey little thing! wahahaha.. yea.. then after that we took 54 back home.. hmm.. dearie is leaving for malaysia tmr ... i hope he enjoys himself!.. hee dearie and i talked alot today.. and again.. i got t understand him better again!.. today was a great day! thank u dearie!.. and once again.. i thank God for u. niteZ all!

2005 is almost over....

2005-12-30T01:05:00.000+08:00

Blink* blink* its 30th december! hee 2005 is going to come to an end... hee.. i've spent, b'dae.. and X'mas with my dearie dearest!.. and yes. i am happy.. xiuquan called me " xin fu de niu ren" and yes.. i do feel that i am one!.. dearie realli make me feel like i'm the luckiest gal in the whole universe!.. x'mas was fun! going for mid nite mass.. staying up till 6 am toking to dearie at church carpark.. x'mas dinner at carLtoN was great! realli do treasure spending all those time with dearie.. everyday of my life juZ revolves ard him. thank u sarah.. aud.. for all ur presents and well wishes for this x'mas! tmr am going to take pics! for my basic photo class! i hope i take some good pics:) well. today.. i went dearie's place.. and we watched the family stone! its a sad show.. while watching the show.. i told dearie that someday i would like to spend a white x'mas! and dearie said ok! we'll go with his mum! after watching the movie.. i dunnoe y.. i juZ logged onto my blog and started reading it.. i begin to tear.. i realised that i wrote so many things bout my daily life.. and each and every entry, dearie will be in it.. can't help becuZ he has integrated into my life.. i read all my entries for this yr.. and recalled many sad times... but of cuZ there were good and happy times too! juZ that i've realised that dearie and i realli been thru alot.. we quarrel and get upset over many many things.. but we learn from all of them.. each time that we fall.. we pick ourselves up again.. and dearie.. i am still holding on to ur hand, as u told me to from the very first day, to journey with u.. thru it all... hmm..its coming 2 am.. should go and sleep soon.. that'll be all for today..

I LOvE U!

2005-12-22T02:41:00.000+08:00

hmmm.... was feeling realli ARGhhhhhhhh this morning.. hmm was thinking bout all and wat that has happened the passed few days.. thats y.. i seem so frustrated in my previous entry.. anyways.. juZ got home not long from chinablack.. hmm i hope dearie was alrite.. realli scared he got angry when i told him i'm going there.. hmmm.. i miss u dearie.. more than anything else.. i can't wait to see u on friday!!.. saturday.. sunday... and monday!!! hmm.. all in all i love u dearie.. more than anything else!..

saddened...

2005-12-21T11:41:00.000+08:00

i nvr like u to mention about ur exgirlfriends.. telling me wat happened between u guys... cuZ every one time i hear them i get hurt a thousand times deeper.. and i guess u nvr knew..

updateS...

2005-12-21T11:02:00.000+08:00

hmm.. its been long since i updated my blog... and one entry tat i've been wanting to blog bout was my birthday!.. which was on 10 dec.. and its a day.. that i'll remember for a lifetime.
basically i cried alot tat day.. cuZ i was too touched.. and lost for words... it happened that day when i had to go for a lecture in sch, it was a last min replacement lect.. thats y sat still have to go back..then i was there early.. super early. so i sat i class... then waited but nobody came..then my one of my coursemate came in.. she said" hey! i heard its ur B'dae!".. happy B'dae!!" then she passed me 3 roses.. then the next person who came in.. said.. ADEL its ur B'dae HAPPY BDAE! then passed me another 3 roses...and.. basically every one who consecutively came in passed me 3 roses... i was like.. OMG!!!! then in the end.. sarah came in with james. and handed me another bouquet of roses... i was juZ to touched and lost for words.. and then my phone rang.. dearie called! i could nvr explain the feeling.. i cried... i didn't noe wat to say.. then i went back to class asking sarah how it happened.. dearie called my friend, sarah,
and they planned for it..he drove to far east flora the nite before to buy me all the flowers
then he drove to her house, deposit the flowers then my friend, sarah, took a cab to sch today
with all the roses hahaha!!
then that morning..she waited till i was in the class then she and James, also my friend stood at the lift outside so.. everyone who came out from the lift received roses to pass to me in class. aWWW.. how sweet... ha.. thats part 1..
part 2. i tot dearie had to go for his archery competition today.. but he forgo it and i did not noe..
i went home after sch to put the flowers and stuff.. dearie has been calling me since then cuZ he had to make sure he knew where i was and made sure i was realli home.. yep.. then not long later.. someone pressed the door bell.. and OMG!!!!! he appeared in my house!!!
he came to visit my mum. he came with another bouquet of sunflowers!! i was like.. another one???!!!
yea.. then my mum said.. no place to put liao hahhaa then he say.. no.. the roses in the morning was to make her cry.. now.. the sun flowers are her fav flowers!!
then my mum was like.. oh.. ok...my dad was not home every one was fishing..so onli my mum is home then my mum.. was like toking la.. say y everytime come home so late. bla blah blah..
hahaahthen dearie was like okok auntie..yea.. then we went orchard..juZ when we were crossing the road to walk towards hello singtel.. dearie stopped at the swensens there.. then it was long Q.. then he said.. we no need Q..CuZ he reserved seats already.. then i was like WOAH
then guess wat when i went in? my friends from sch were all there! thats part 3!.. another pleasant surprise!! all my good friends were there..i was like....OMG...then i cry again...
i guess i will really really remember this the rest of my life... hmm.. next.. updates on recent days of my life... hmm.. life's been good.. juZ that yesterday.. daddy said some things that hurt me alot.. he made me realli scared to continue my relationship.. the things he told me really affected me alot.. but.. NVR.. NVR will i give up.. because.. if i do.. then isn't it juZ like wat he said..that "we are still young.. things will change" because of wat he said.. i cried the whole day.. till my eyes were swollen.. althought dearie asked me not to be affected by wat he said.. but still because dearie.. i love u so much that i really do not wanna lose u. thank u for always reassuring me that everything is fine.. thank u for being there when i needed u most. and with this dearie.. with wat u have assured me, yes, i will stay strong.. and prove daddy wrong... and on that very day, we will tell him, "daddy, we made it!"

again.....

2005-12-01T00:04:00.000+08:00

i am toking to u now, can u hear me? i am missing u so much , do u noe it? can u juZ stay awake for juZ a little longer, cuZ even if its for juZ a few more mins. we are talking about a situation now, but it feels like u juZ shut me up by saying goodnite. u always say u noe, and u understand, but perhaps u dun realli know. becuZ u r not the one experiencing it. it juZ hurts so much to want sth, but yet u can't seem to have it. i always wanna look back and think y is it that u can do that last time but not now? y is it that no matter how busy, or how tired u are u would make time and perhaps come to see me? but not now? maybe i am being unreasonable again. but juZ wanna express all my feelings and thoughts out. well, perhaps sometimes, i ask too much. or perhaps i dream too much, time to smack myself back to reality and now. cuZ perhaps things are different from then. although i always try to tell myself that its ok, its ok to juZ see u once a week... but the fact is no, its not ok. because its different. dunnoe y but juZ feel so down now... i need u .. but where r u?

a different sunday

2005-11-28T00:47:00.000+08:00

hmm.. its kinda late.. and i wanna go Zzz soon... but i tot i should blog first.. since i haven been updating.. well.. today is a different sunday because i spent the whole day at home. even mum found it surprising. i tried to complete my sourcing and costing worksheet, but it was a headache and i gave up looking at numbers!! hur.. then was busy preparing the YCS spiritual session that is going to happen on coming tuesday. and i finally completed it. Just. hmm.. and i miss kenneth very much. i hope i get to see him tmr.. cuZ thats like the onli day i could think off.. and i noe dearie has to train for his upcoming competition. so dun think i will see him on the other weekdays.. but worry not! as i always tell dearie i will understand juZ like how i've understood:) dun want to feel sad bout not seeing dearie cuZ i noe that will affect him too. dearie likes to see me smile, be the happy and playful ade like i always am. anyways, today felt weird cuZ dearie was not around me.. sth's missing..hmm.. anyways LovE u lotS dearie!. am going to zzz now. gd nite.

2005-11-17T23:20:00.000+08:00

i'm coping alrite in sch.. everything's back to normal.. life is going on fine. :)

NEvER Felt THis WAY

2005-11-04T23:56:00.000+08:00

you've pierced and shattered my heart, it hurts now. more than anything else, tears are rolling not stop, i want to see u badly, so badly.. but i noe i can't. i can't feel anything now, all i noe is i'm hurt.

Thursday, 3rd NoV 2005

2005-11-03T23:29:00.000+08:00

its been long since i last realli blogged, and I've got my new desktop fixed! so.. i decided to blog today... hmm.. adel was running a temperature yesterday at 38.7 degress celsius!.. but i'm better now.. yesterday was a real bad day.. i tot i was gonna die when i was freaking burning when i was at dearie's place, i felt i was gonna faint while waiting for dearie.. but finally.. dearie's home! thank u dearie for taking care of me for that few hours. taking me to see the doc and driving me home and all.. making sure i took my medicine and went la la land.. (slept) alrites, enough of yesterday, lets tok bout today, well today when i woke up, i felt realli bad.. i couldn't breathe.. couldnt tok.. and my temperature was running high again... woke up.. mummy made me cereal... took medicine.. and i went back to la la land again... woke up at bout 11 plus.. i felt perfectly fine! no more body aches, no more fever.. no more nothing!. ha.. then later in the afternoon, i could even jump around!.. miracle yeah? i tot so! heh.. then i could even go out and meet dearie... hmm.. today is a day that dearie and i would have been together for a year.. today last year was the day we got together.. but i guess its alrite, as everything is fine now.. i would compensate the 3 months back to dearie.. doubly.everytime when i think back bout this i get realli upset, because i guess i realli upset dearie the last time.. so.. i will nvr wanna fail him again.. never. juZ by saying this reminded me bout the movie. "all about love" the male lead was trying his very best to spent what ever time with his sick wife, because, he had left her so long.. everyday after they reunited, he would celebrate a festival with her to compensate those times that he was not there right beside her.. and so dearie, as i said before, i missed spending X'mas last yr and ur B'Dae with u, so i promise, i'll nvr wanna miss it again, i wanna be there for u. not onli every X'mas, every B'dae, but every day of our lifes :) dearie, adel LovEs U! more than anything else. dun ever ever forget that.

today is a better day!

2005-11-02T01:47:00.000+08:00

hey hey hey!.. hmm.. havent been updating my blog.. so i decided to do so today.. well.. things have been better.. much better.....

no longer the gal u used to know.

2005-10-23T05:39:00.000+08:00

its 5.27 am now.. i can't sleep.. there is juZ so much going thru my mind now.. juZ so much.. my heart hurts.. but no one ever knows.. my eyes have teared till it tears have run dry.. my soul and all inside me.. i am filled with sadness. sometimes ade does things that juZ allows people to get pissed at me. she does things without thinking whats the consequences.. she makes judgement without knowing the situation. she's bad... ade has changed.. perhaps i'm no longer the ade that u used to love so much anymore.. i'm no longer the ade u used to know.. and i'm no longer the ade that was bubbly and cheerful.. the ade now.. is always in tears.. and Y? she often questioned herself.. i've sinned. deeply. how can i be the someone i used to be?.. how can i ever not tear again?.. how can i take all things in my stride..and not utter a word of sadness inside me? for all the things that i say seemed to hurt others.. all in all i'm sorry.

2005-10-19T01:43:00.000+08:00

hmm... finally i think i could sleep in peace tonite.. well today was an exciting day! had my hair cut at FoX.. hee my favourite salon!... went to give tuition today.. then went to meet sister before we went fox. hmm... i dunnoe how ta describe my hair cut..some ppl say its nice.. some ppl say its not.. my mum said i dun look decent.. hur hur hur.. so.. its up to u to decide la!.. but for me i felt it was alrite.. a new look.. achieve the aim of covering up my forehead. hee.. cuZ ade has got a high forehead.. so yep.. most imptly! dearie says its nice! so it must be nice la! hhaha.. sister's one was nice too! the colour gave her face a fresher look!.. brightened it up. hmm.. sister headed home.. but.. i tot i needed to see dearie badly... so i took a bus down to meet him.. hmm.. after seeing him, i felt at peace. it was like a sign of relief.. i tot alot last nite.. so much that i couldn't sleep.. i didn't even wanna do anything.. i juZ stared into the ceiling in my room.. tears jUZ can't stop flowing... i guess.. that little wrong things that happen in this relationship of ours will juZ saddened me as this relationship that we are holding on to really mean alot to me.. and little things that happen, ade is afraid she might juZ trigger sth.. and puff! everything's gone.. well, after meeting dearie.. i dunnoe y but i can't seem to control my tears again.. i juZ have to let it out.. but i dun want dearie to see me this way.. cuZ i noe it upsets him to see me cry.. well dearie.. i hope u dun feel that adel has been crying too much lately.. hmm.. i guess i could finally fall asleep in peace..

KaYA PaNcaKe )yummY YummY

2005-10-13T00:16:00.000+08:00

hee.. today was a great day.. received a call from dearie.. that he had off.. so.. we could spend the day together again! yep.. went over to his place for a while.. then i got bored.. so.. was toking to sister online.. then soon.. we left house.. went out.. :) watch a movie at PS.. then walked ard in orchard.. during our walk.. we talked.. talked alot.. then we walked all the way back to PS and then took the train home... btw.. thank u dearie for the kaya pancake! as i said.. u are the sweetest bf anyone could ever have!.. no.. wrong.. i mean.. the sweetest bf onli i can have. heh.. love u lots dearie! muackZz!!!

2005-10-01T04:41:00.000+08:00

oh no.. aDeL can't sleep... i guess i have been sleeping too much yesterday and today... i'm still wide awake.. its coming 4!!... read sister's blog... hahaa.. so funni... realli entertaining.. toking to her now too... her life is juZ so interesting.. hahah.. hmm... there's juZ alot of things that i wanna say.. but i dunnoe how to put it.. these are times when i can't sleep, i'll stay up and think bout life.. i sortta took out my own diary to read it... and wow!.. i surprised myself, for all the things i've been thru, the places i went, the things i did, the happiness i had, the tears i cried, over many many things... reading them juZ reminds me of the past so much.. hmm... i dunnoe y am i here blogging again... there's juZ so many tots running thru my mind... i hope i will feel tired and go sleep soon..... well, things at home are fine again, thank u lord for answering my prayers... oh no.. its coming 5.. and i am still awake.. help....

2005-09-30T23:39:00.000+08:00

hmm... juZ got home.. been out with jess... well today was a slack day.. hmm.. didn't do much things.. gave tuition..was waiting for dearie to message me.. but he didn't.. till he ended work.. tot he forgot me liao.. adel is fine.. juZ felt sth missing today thats all.. i guess i miss dearie.. but adel, its onli one day that u nvr see him.. aiyo.... i better stop this.. its bad.. i dun like feeling this way.. well.. yea.. went out with sister.. wanted to catch a movie.. but full house!.. so we went for dinner.. hmm.. super full.... alrites.. gtg shower...

if every dream is of u, i will wanna sleep forever...

2005-09-26T02:07:00.000+08:00

if every dreams is of u.. i will wanna sleep forever.... dearie.. adel loves u.. lots... dun worry k.. nth happened, i juZ felt that i needed to see u a little longer, before i dun get to see u for the next few days.. thats y i ran downstairs.. i believe that few mins did help me alot, u r sound asleep now and i will try to go to la la land as well.. * muackZz*

WoooHOooo

2005-09-19T01:41:00.000+08:00

hee.. i have been spending lotsa time with dearie.. lots.. haha.. well today is so called the last day.. cuZ dearie gotta go back archery.. was kinda sad when he told me that.. but worry not adel is understanding.. and will continue to understand like how i have understood. today was a crazy day.. was supposed to go give tuition.. but then in the end it was cancelled..so i dearie and i spent the whole day together! whenever i'm with dearie.. i'm at peace with myself.. he calms me down.. he cheers me up.. he makes my day! adel loves U lotS loTs and lotS. dearie always asked me how much i love him.. and dear.. my love for u is unmeasureable, cuZ it can't be compared to anything.. absolutely nothing.. if there is anything i can do to prove that amt, i would:) well this morning started out kinda strange, ha.. received a call from jia hui, asked if we could meet, so i met her before i went to church, meeting up was good, we toked, but sad that we didn't have much time.. but thursday! we are meeting up again! ha.. so then we could tok all we want!.. then in the evening, dearie drove to pick sister up then we went east coast park!.. it was crowded, many kids running here and there, dogs cats.. hahha.. adel screamed many times! hur hur.. meow!.. heh.. then we walked walked walked..till a point where we felt we should make a U turn. so we did.. its was late too, thereafter we dearie drove us home:) well, today on the bus after church, i was in deep tots, i was thinking bout many things, things that happened... esp mummy.. hmm... things hasn't been good, she has been weird.. everyone in the familiy seemed to be leading their own lives, adel doesn't noe wats going on... its diff to tok to them. i havent been spending time at home.. cuZ adel is afraid to stay home.. staying home juZ increases the friction that i have been having with mum.. everything that everyone does juZ doesn't seem rite.. sometimes, to the extent that i couldn't realli stand her.. well, i leave house early in the morning, come home late in the nite, friction is lessen...perhaps, peace could be found back again.. somehow...

2005-09-06T20:04:00.000+08:00

finally the hols are here... its been a busy semester... realli busy.. well i hope to do well in this semester.. cuZ i guess i've put in lotsa effort in it.. and i realli did. hmmm.. sch's over for me.. but.. everything home juZ doesn't seem rite.. adel juz doesn't noe wats wrong... well bro's in e hos. everyone at home is pissed.. seems like anything that i do can trigger them to explode within.. dunnoe wats wrong.. but i felt sad.. juZ sad.. daddy doesn't seem to understand.. adel doesn't seem to be to control herself at home.. i get angry at things that i can juZ shut up and let is pass, but i can't... adel doesn't understand y sometimes parents can juZ do wrong and argue that they are rite, while kids have to shut up!.. its jUz not right to educate their child this way. cuZ wat goes around comes around.. it'll be back.. i will nvr fail to apologise if i feel that i am in the wrong, BUT why can't they juZ do the same? adel hates Being wronged... i mean who likes that?.. well haiZ... i guess i juZ got to wait till everything well again. cuZ i feel so helpless at home, there's nothing i can do...

it seemed so long..

2005-08-25T01:19:00.000+08:00

dearie!. it was 2 days that i didn't see u but it felt like 2 weeks.. thanks for coming today. well.. today was a good day afterall.. surprised by my freshies! ha.. "Design Ooi" heh.. friendly dudes and dudettes! after sch went to give tuition.. i hope my little jeryL pass his exams sia.. if not i dunnoe how to help him also... hmm after that waited for dearie... waited and waited.. finallY!!! heee.. when i opened the door of the car... yes i admitted, it was a sign of relief that i saw him.. dearie... i juZ miss u too much till i was speachless i guess. thanks for the surprise at marina south!. it was a nice view of .. everything!. i realli cherish that moment and every moment that i have with u. thank u for being with me all these while. luB ya! and... update ur blog can? :p

true Love is the soul's recognition of its counter point in another

2005-08-22T01:17:00.000+08:00

i begin to believe in that phrase. ha.. today was a much much better day. dearie and i went star gazing!! ha... enjoyed the breeze... weather was realli nice.. thanks dear.. having u in my life brings me great joy.

life has Been...

2005-08-21T00:59:00.000+08:00

its been a long time since i last blogged.. juZ hung up the phone with dearie.. and sad to say i am crying.. i dunnoe y.. i guess i am upset.. upset cuZ of wat? i do not noe.. dearie.. i guess i miss u.. hmm.. i guess i've grown to rely on u too much.. i tot i could see u after work.. but i didn't.. well.. i guess i'm juZ too used to seeing u there.. and whenever u are not, i felt sth missing.. and times when i noe u noe that sth is wrong.. but i juZ refuse to say anything.. i wanted so much to take a cab down to ur place, but then again i didn't... i guess i'm stress!. please hols.. Please.. i need a Break!

strEss OUT

2005-08-05T01:40:00.000+08:00

its been long again since i last blogged.. hur hur.. been realli busy in sch.. theres jUZ too many things to do... i need a break!... anyways.. its late.. gonna Zzz.. gotta reach sch by 8 am tmr... ha.
luB ya dearie.

its been 21 days....

2005-07-22T01:37:00.000+08:00

OMG.. its been 21 days since i last logged in to update!!. well.. not possible for me to traced back wat happened though.. but.. the 11 days was.. quite bad though.. many things happened.. many many.. many were sad.. most were tired.. haiZ... hols jUZ ended for me!.. one week juZ like that... haiZ... anyways.. been alrite with life... then juZ wanna do well for my semester!!. adel.. no more slacking.. WOrk!! work!! work!!!!!!!!!!!!.. all the best.

super SLack day!

2005-07-10T12:10:00.000+08:00

ha.. today woke up.. went over to meet dearie.. my day was jUz super slack. ha.. rested well too..slept till super late.. so had to go evening mass at CTK.. hmm... then later went over to grandma's place.. nvr go for super long liao... missed DEXtER!!! hahah.. thats our dog btw.. :P yep.. and o yea.. MOoviee was nice.. Serendipity. sth i'll always remember..

smiLe!

2005-07-05T01:45:00.000+08:00

ha.. well.. havent blogged for a few days.. so.. yea.. well today went to sch.. from 12- 3.. then later went ta meet dearie!. aha.. so fun.. although movie was very very lame.. WaR Of ThE woRLds... wat a weird ending.. i couldn't understand.. ha.. then we went esplanade.. sat by the river.. ha.. not far from where we were we could see fire workS!.. ha.. must be for the rehearse for NDP.. well was nice !.. weather was good scenary was great! yep.. and we toked.. bout LiFe... ha.. yep.. then bout 10 plus.. we went home.. hmm.. sometimes i juZ wonder wat is it in us that we can think So alike.. that.. i realli do not understand. Much.. haha..dearie says cuZ we are in love.. well.. yea.. perhaps thats Y.. but then again.. not all couples that are in love think alike noe.. ha.. cuZ opposite attracts.. heh!.. alrites.. anyways.. gtg zZz..

saDDened....

2005-07-01T20:55:00.000+08:00

hur hur.. can someone please help me!!! help!! haiZ... i dunnoe y la.. but aDe seems to be PMSing alot!!! hur hur... every little thing that anybody does seemed to irritate me.. haiZ.. haiZ... and there's juZ so much to do at sch.. i can't take it already la.. and daddy is not helping!!! he is juZ so unreasonable at times!!! juZ can't stand the way he behaves sometimes.. i juZ got to sort out my tots abit... yea...